After a few terms at college you realise that, once ordained, you will be spending quite a lot of time doing funerals, and funeral visits, and that you may well preach as many eulogies as sermons. We have lots of weddings this summer, which are wonderful occasions, even if the curate isn’t necessarily sure of what she is doing all the time. (Although I seem to have managed OK so far.) But I suppose I didn’t really think that we might be doing so many funerals as well, especially during the summer, as the number of people we serve is not that large. The third funeral in five weeks in our parishes happens this week.
Well, actually it will the second funeral for me as curate because I was excused the funeral last week I should have been assisting at to go to one of my own – for someone I had known and worked with for 30 years. And for whom I gave the first real eulogy I have ever done. It was a privilege to do and I was pleased to be able to contribute to our celebration of our friend, colleague, son, brother, in that way. And it was a celebration too – with the family all wearing colourful clothes, with great music, and lots of laughter and good memories at the lunch afterwards. Unfortunately I am no stranger to funerals – I think that the tally stands at about 25 or so now – but this was the first ‘non-working’ funeral I have been at since being ordained. To start with I prepared and gave a eulogy. And even though I was just an ordinary mourner, I found that I cannot switch off the ‘professional eye’ and stop noticing good and not so good ways of doing things, and stop looking at the watch to see how near the service is running to the 45 mins allowed, and wondering where the vicar got that prayer from, and whether the crematorium staff liked dealing with wicker coffins (beautiful things, I would like one myself when the time comes), and why the coffin was left on trestles rather than put on the catafulque, and…
Something to reflect on and watch, because sometimes I need to mourn too…
Well, actually it will the second funeral for me as curate because I was excused the funeral last week I should have been assisting at to go to one of my own – for someone I had known and worked with for 30 years. And for whom I gave the first real eulogy I have ever done. It was a privilege to do and I was pleased to be able to contribute to our celebration of our friend, colleague, son, brother, in that way. And it was a celebration too – with the family all wearing colourful clothes, with great music, and lots of laughter and good memories at the lunch afterwards. Unfortunately I am no stranger to funerals – I think that the tally stands at about 25 or so now – but this was the first ‘non-working’ funeral I have been at since being ordained. To start with I prepared and gave a eulogy. And even though I was just an ordinary mourner, I found that I cannot switch off the ‘professional eye’ and stop noticing good and not so good ways of doing things, and stop looking at the watch to see how near the service is running to the 45 mins allowed, and wondering where the vicar got that prayer from, and whether the crematorium staff liked dealing with wicker coffins (beautiful things, I would like one myself when the time comes), and why the coffin was left on trestles rather than put on the catafulque, and…
Something to reflect on and watch, because sometimes I need to mourn too…
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